This one's pretty geeky, even for me...

I actually tried to do some due diligence on this post: some comics blogger, out there somewhere, had a post referring to the DC Direct Crisis on Infinite Earths Weaponer of Qward figure as the geekiest thing ever. (I was positive it was Mike Sterling on Progressive Ruin, and he did set me straight on the real Nerdiest Object Ever, but he says it wasn't him! And a big thanks to Mike for getting back to me!) The gist of the post was, the amount of time and effort and possibly charts that it would take to explain that figure to a non-comics reader would be extreme. (If you manage to get as far as "anti-matter universe," your listener has the patience of a saint.) Which brings us, to this:

Pinky there is based off the current look of the Weaponers, and at least gets long pants now. The DC Infinite Heroes version of the Weaponer of Qward is also much smaller, and thus easier to hide than the DC Direct figure. And since I got him for seventy-five cents, well...

So, I got five of the little guys, for just about half of what the usual price was for one. I tried to resist, but that's pretty darn cheap for a small army; and I hated the idea of some cheap, uncaring relative picking one up for a hapless child and scraping the sale sticker off the package. For the price, it's tough to be critical, but the fact that the "Weaponer of Qward" doesn't come with a goddamn weapon, is kind of indicative of the care and effort put into this line...

There have been later waves in the DCIH line, and supposedly the next batch will have a new articulation model, but I gotta figure that line has got one foot in the grave. I haven't bought any of them for the usual suggested retail price of $6.99, because they completely are not worth that. Even at $4.99, you would still feel like you got stiffed an accessory or something; and even Batman didn't come with a Batarang. I have the feeling that Mattel was totally enthusiastic when DCIH was planned and first coming out, then lost interest; it's going to take a lot of effort to turn it around now.

Also this weekend, a little yard sale goodness: first up, a Transformers figure that I believe was Evac. Maybe. He's in pretty good shape, except he's missing the helicopter blades...

Still, not a bad crowd-filler; and he has neat clawed feet...that I cut off on the picture. Also, I got an Iron Man Transformer, the later edition in the War Machine colors, and he was mostly complete:

Not a bad weekend, no. Oh, except for Wolverine. Not the movie itself; but I thought the Youngest would sit through it. Ooh, was I wrong. So, very wrong. Reckon I'm going to just go the DVD route for him for the near future; but the Oldest and I might see if we can go to Star Trek later.
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Your Happenstance page for today:

Hey, it's the Doom Patrol!...maybe? Kind of? From the 2002 Doom Patrol #4, "Blink...and it's Gone" Written by John Arcudi and illustrated by Tan Eng Huat. When Robotman and his new team quit their corporate sponsor, they lose the rights to the name, and a new version is formed with former member Beast Boy, recently not dead Metamorpho, the non-rapist Dr. Light, and a strangely wifeless Elongated Man. Seriously, did Sue have the flu or something? Weird to see Ralph without her.

This was a great looking, but not easy reading, comic; which may have played against it. Also, as we find out in #5, Robotman hadn't really been there the whole time, as Cliff finally tries to ask Rex why he's not dead:

Man, if that sort of thing happened in the X-Men books, there wouldn't be room for anything else. I do like the idea of Metamorpho with the Doom Patrol, which I think was first postulated in that Silver Age event, and came up again in Byrne's Doom Patrol as well. He'd be a good fit, yet bring a little levity to the group.

Anyway, after a moderately terrible week of work, the boys and I are going to X-Men Origins: Wolverine tonight! Have a good weekend!

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Where Judge Dredd and Brian Bolland part ways:

I was introduced to Judge Dredd around 1986 or so, mostly via the incredible art of Brian Bolland. (Which is both a pro and a con: it's good stuff, but then it took me a while to fully appreciate Mike McMahon and Carlos Ezquerra.) I can remember a copy of White Dwarf (a RPG magazine) that I picked up just for the Bolland cover. The thing of it is, that probably wasn't new art; and Bolland probably hadn't drawn Dredd in a couple of years by that point. Maybe. I've been trying to figure out exactly when Bolland quit drawing Judge Dredd, since I know he went to DC Comics around 1979 or so for Camelot 3000. (EDIT: Actually, Bolland may have been 'discovered' by DC in 1979, Camelot 3000 was a twelve issue 'monthly' miniseries that ran 1982 to 1985. Ouch. Still, he beat Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk.)

This page is from Fleetway/Quality's Judge Dredd #44, and from GCD we find it originally appeared in the "2000 AD 1988 Judge Dredd Annual." (Between the reprints and the numbering of 'progs,' I lose track.) It's easy to see how Bolland could want to do something else after being so closely associated with Dredd; and currently he's probably best known for his cover work for DC, particularly Jack of Fables. I've seen one or two of his experimental Mr. Mamoulian strips, in Negative Burn, which I bought primarily for a new Milk & Cheese strip. Hey, comics anthology editors: I would have bought that Kramer's Ergot thing if it'd had a new Milk & Cheese strip.

(That may not be true, but I would've considered it.)
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"No Man Employs the Manhunters."

I would've liked to get at least one more Manhunter for this one, to better give the impression that there were an army of long-necked, frowny-faced robots. I paid $1.20 a piece for these two, marked down from $6.99; which makes me wonder if the new articulation model for DC Infinite Heroes is even going to make it to the shelves. I guess they could always release it online, which seems to be the way the winds are blowing lately.

A questionable history lesson, with the Manhunters, the Transformers, and Galactus; after the break!

For those of you who aren't DC historians: The Manhunters were the first attempt from the Guardians of the Universe (the little blue guys in red smocks, that I still don't have figures of, but could probably sub in Papa Smurf) at a universe-wide peace keeping force. They were androids equipped with stun guns they charged with proto-Green Lanterns, and kept the peace for (at least) thousands of years. Then they went bad, power-mad, and tried to take over. Failing miserably, the androids were abandoned; and the Guardians replaced them with the Green Lantern Corps.

I used to know the ballpark timeline on this: if the universe is like five billion years old, and the Guardians became Guardians four billion years ago...and I could be way off on this, but I swear I thought Steve Englehart marked a lot of their history in billion year increments, with the Manhunters at three and the GLC coming in at two. Two billion years of Green Lanterns? The number staggers the mind a bit to casually throw around, not to mention that would mean the Corps survived all that time yet has been just about demolished two or three times since letting earth men in...

If I was better organized, I could probably figure out the Transformers timeline as well. In the old comics (and again, I'm going off memory here) the war between the Autobots and Decepticons had been going for umpteen billion years, before Optimus Prime and Megatron's crews crashed on earth back in the Paleozoic era or thereabouts. OK, but then when they were finally revived around 1984, not only is the war on Cybertron still going, with people they knew from before they were lost, but Optimus and Megatron are still somehow in charge, aren't they? Shouldn't they have been replaced after going missing, and shouldn't that have been done after maybe a month or so? (Similarly, in the first movie, Megatron was frozen in ice for something like eighty years or so; but when Starscream catches up to him, he still obsequiously defers to his leader as if Megs had just been out for a coffee break. Wouldn't Starscream have taken over during that time?) I think later work has glossed this over a bit, that Prime and Megs were leaders of their respective factions or cells, but the larger Autobot and Decepticon nations continued without them. War aside, you can debate for yourselves why the Transformers as a species aren't much changed in millions of years...

Then there's Galactus, and his heralds. How long was the Silver Surfer's stint as herald? Conservatively, I think it was decades; but it's hard to say. The Zenn-Lavians like Norrin Radd and Shalla Bal appear to be pretty long-lived, but in the classic Stan Lee/John Buscema series, Shalla still looks on the younger side. And she's still pining away for her lost love like he's been gone for a good chunk of time; but maybe not centuries.

On the sliding timescale of Marvel, Galactus arrived on earth and was stopped by the Fantastic Four maybe eight or nine years ago. Since the betrayal of the Surfer, Galactus has had several other heralds: Air-Walker, Firelord, and the Destroyer; all of whom would've had short tenures before Frankie Raye became Nova. If you figure the first visit of Galactus was before Franklin Richards was born, and he was maybe four when Frankie left...man, Galactus was just giving away the power cosmic there for a while.

Of course, none of those happened in the same fictional continuum, outside of my toy pile anyway. I was going to finish up with a couple of Manhunter pages--none from Millenium, the Manhunters' revenge, though: I bought that series as it came out, but have long since lost it. And most of the crossovers. Still, maybe a Manhunter page or two on Friday.

Oh, and the Optimus and Megatron in this strip may look a little different than you're used to: I believe they were both from the Robots in Disguise cartoon. Not the best one; and it was a little more kiddy than a lot of fans were hoping for, but if I remember right it was the first non-Beast Wars Transformers cartoon and toys back on American shelves in years. They've maintained their presence since.

I'm not an expert on that show, though: I remember Skybyte, the flying shark; and one of the "Autobot Brothers" with a somewhat inappropriate love of earth cars. Look it up sometime, if you're curious. Probably still made more sense than the movie, anyway...
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I know you haven't patrolled the Mariana Trench lately, Arthur.

...or under the Arctic ice shelf, or the Dead Sea...

Aquaman apologists trot this one out every so often, and he even uses it himself here: while Superman or Batman just have to worry about land-based problems, Aquaman has a lot more ground to cover...and I totally wrecked that metaphor. Shoot. The point they make, is that Aquaman's whole beat is all of the world's bodies of water, below or above the surface. This is often invoked as if to suggest that Aquaman personally patrols them all, which is silly: not only would that take forever, but it's not like he's a mall cop making his rounds, is it?

Moreover, every time Superman or Batman has to fight a super-villain that has an underwater base or a sub, they should get to bill Aquaman. Or punch him in the arm really hard. Seriously! If that's Aquaman's jurisdiction, shouldn't he have taken care of, or at least noticed and mentioned, Lex Luthor's undersea hideout or the Penguin's sub or whatever? If Aquaman was doing his job, Batman shouldn't even have to chase bad guys that try to escape via water. And Hawaii. That should be all Aquaman. Yeah.

Overthinking a page from Batman: Gotham Knights #18, "Cavernous" Written by Devin Grayson, pencils by Roger Robinson, inks by John Floyd. Brian Bolland does the cover, and...was that costume a bit of a train wreck? Shell headband, bare midriff, metal hand: it makes me miss the orange shirt.
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Breaking News: Jeff Goldblum not dead!

In case you missed it, last week there was a batch of celebrity deaths either misreported or outright hoaxed on Twitter. Goldblum's alleged "death" from a fall in New Zealand, was picked up by the Australian media as confirmed by the New Zealand police. Goldblum later appeared on the Colbert Report to rebuke the story. With mixed results.

Goldblum, of course, is best known for starring in The Fly, Independence Day, and Jurassic Park; as well as for his multiple clashes with Mecha-Godzilla.

I found that Jeff figure, from Trendmasters' 1996 ID4 line, in a yard sale on the fourth: if there's a better example of that happenstance I'm always on about, I'd love to see it. I also got Mecha-Godzilla there, and some random Beast Wars Transformers.


I liked that cartoon, but don't recognize these two; and they may or may not have even appeared on the show. They do look to be more or less complete, and transforming yard-sale rescues like them is like worry beads for me, something to fiddle with while watching TV or waiting for the kids. I need to set up another Transformers display sometime.

Lastly, I picked up this little orphan, and hopefully Diamondrock will forgive me a bit of snark:
A sadly capeless, weaponless, Azrael-Batman. I don't believe I've ever had one before, and I have a pretty good pile of Batmen. Still, I couldn't leave this poor guy behind. Not bad little hauls so far this summer!
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Happy Fourth of July!

Ah, any excuse to drag this one out again...I would like to try it again and get new pictures someday. It just occurs to me that I have the shirtless Namor figure, so I could do new ones with him tossing the Cap-cube into the drink. Well, maybe next year. Have a happy Fourth, and be careful out there!
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